What does it mean to be exceptional?

Photo Credit: Humphrey Muleba https://unsplash.com/@good_citizen

Since launching our boutique coaching and consulting firm in March 2021, I have had the opportunity to meet a ton of new people and introduce our services.  When asked what we do, I lead with the statement, “We help leaders be exceptional.”  This typically sparks more discussion about how and why. This week, someone asked “what does it mean to be exceptional?”  Here was my answer:  “Being exceptional means you live freely, you work and live in alignment with your unique purpose and operate with a growth mindset, you make decisions through the lens of abundance.  You create good things for yourself and others.”

Living in freedom is living out your purpose without constraint. 

Living Free

Freedom can come in many forms- Freedom of speech, freedom to act, freedom of choice.  As a person of faith, I believe that I live under the grace of God’s freedom.  This means that I am not indebted to anything or anyone.  This allows me to make choices for my life based on my moral compass.  I have the freedom to be a victim or a victor.  I choose daily to be a victor.  I have the freedom to do the work that I believe I was designed to do.  I have the freedom to take my whole self wherever I go without feeling like I need to appear more like someone else who might be more energetic, charismatic, engaging or insert whatever adjective that fits for you. I have the freedom to speak up for things that I believe are essential.  Because I live freely, I can say “yes” to the things that I was created to do and “no” to the things that do not serve me.  I believe that we were all created with a unique combination of talents, gifts and strengths.  Living in freedom is living out your purpose without constraint. 

Alignment with your unique purpose

As an Insights® certified facilitator, I help individuals and teams understand the four basic color energies used for interacting with others.  A fundamental principle of the Insights model is that we all have access to each of the four color energies, however the combination of how we access and apply these energies vary from person to person.  For example, two different people may both lead with Earth Green energy.  This is the energy of nurturing, warmth, loyalty and relationships.  However, the way that each person shows up will be different. 

This same principle applies to individual purpose.  You may have similar strengths, skills and abilities as another person, but you are not that person.  What works for that individual will have no implications on what will work for you.  The biggest source of discontent that I see with my clients is when they are operating out of alignment with their individual purpose.  It is so easy to get distracted by the path and success of others; but trying to walk another’s path is a direct route to failure. I work with my clients on gaining clarity on their own unique purpose and establishing their purpose as the anchor for the work that they do.  

“When you operate with a growth mindset, problems become opportunities, the unknown becomes a challenge and the future becomes a destination of endless possibilities. ”

Operating with a growth mindset

I do a lot of work with clients on mindset. Mindset is defined as the established set of attitudes held by an individual.  A growth mindset is focused on future-oriented evolution and progression.  A fixed mindset can keep you rooted in past mistakes and disappointments. By shifting your mindset to view past mistakes as cycles of growth, you release yourself from the fear of failure in the future. When you operate with a growth mindset, problems become opportunities, the unknown becomes a challenge and the future becomes a destination of endless possibilities. 

Making the shift from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset begins with simple changes in the language that you use.  Eliminating phrases like “I have to” or “I’m trying” and replacing those phrases with “I have the opportunity to” or “ I’m doing my best to.”  Starting from a place of “I can”, “I will”,  or “I am meant to create good things” changes the trajectory of the outcome.  Operating with a growth mindset encourages you to focus on the things that are in your scope of control. A trap that we often fall into is expending a lot of energy on nuisances for which we have no control.  For example, when I encounter a person with a negative attitude, I have a choice in how I respond.  I could choose to focus on the fact that they are mean and disagreeable, or I can put my energy into ensuring that I model what kindness and collaboration looks like.  The person may or may not change their response; but by choosing to operate from my scope of control, I walk away with my own integrity intact.  One unhappy person is better than two unhappy people.  For more insight on operating with a growth mindset check out another of my posts,  “Leading with a Growth Mindset.”

“The fundamental flaw that keeps people “playing it safe” instead of going for what they really want is fear.  ”

Making decisions through a lens of abundance

The fundamental flaw that keeps people “playing it safe” instead of going for what they really want is fear.  Most of the time, that fear is rooted in a belief that there is “not enough to go around”— enough money, enough time, enough opportunities, enough “fill in the blank”.  When we make decisions through the lens of fear and scarcity, we always limit our options.  If you believe that there is “enough”, then you will act with purpose.  Making decisions from a base of abundance allows you to consider all the possibilities and choose or even create the path that leads to the very best outcome.  If you believe that there is not enough money, you may remain in a job that is unfulfilling because you believe that a bird in hand is better than two in the bush.  If you believe that “people like you” don’t get respect, then you won’t advocate from a place of strength for the things you deserve.  Exceptional people do not believe in the myth of limits.  Instead, they look for the boundaries and keep pushing until the right solution is revealed.  

We all have the capacity to be exceptional, but most of us don’t have the courage to.  Are you one of the courageous few?  If not, what’s stopping you? What can you do today that will move you one step closer to becoming the exceptional person you were created to be?

Not sure where to start, let’s chat.

I’d like to invite all of you reading this to share in our journey. If you enjoyed this content, please consider signing up to get the most up-to-date news and information. You can also stay connected with us by giving us a follow on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Instagram.